my life is about to change.

I got an email from mom when I came out of bell lake yurt. we have been approved for a development/expansion loan. I’ve had 24 hours to ponder what this means for my future. in an instant, I see what I will give up. what I want to give up. I will be there for this. I love the hotel. I could cry about this a little. it’ll all work out in the end. I think I am in shock. how much longer will my family let me keep running away?

I am free. I see it now. the longer I spend alone. the more adventures I share with friends being unattached and unbound, the better I feel. I am high as fuck on life.

I’ve had two incredible trips this month. cataract canyon is always equally life changing, this time with most of my favorite people on the river with me. best. trip. ever. week later I did a bell lake yurt trip with another good crew. best. trip. ever. for some reason, despite the lack of skiable snow and everything being wind fucked. and terrifying pit test results. we still skied a ton, found the stashes and skinned our asses off. toured in the sunshine and felt slightly religious. I was sincerely wondering if the awesomeness of these trips had anything to do with where I am personally in my life. how I feel.

I think my attitude towards it might have a lot to do with it. I am so in love with life. this amazing thing. this freedom is what makes me roar. I feel elevated. in fact I feel like my little heart is about to burst from all the excitement and joy. life is a party. get used to it.

I am going to buy a big sky season pass this year. yup.

goose bumps.